Some Words Hurt

Recently, someone called me a bully. This made me realize I am much more sensitive to this word than the people around me. So I decided to make a list of words that are unsafe to use when describing me.

Unsafe Words

If you call me any of these words, I will likely react by proving you right. I know that sounds funny, but I will hurt you. Don't make me angry, you won't like me when I get angry.

• Cheater or Unethical
• Rude
• Unkind
• Unfriendly
• Selfish
• Bullshitter or Liar
• Lazy or Slothful
• Bully
• Mean
• Hateful
• Stupid
• Bad Parent or Bad Husband
• Fuck up
• Unforgiving
• Ignoramus
• Classless
• Illogical

Maybe Words

If you call me any of these I may laugh, cry or sit on you. You have been warned.

• Idiot
• Childish
• Immature
• Sloppy
• Ignorant
• Hurtful
• Big or Fat or Fat-ass
• Asshole
• Moron

Other Words

I don't mind being called these, although I have found that some people are sensitive to them. In the immortal words of the late Dr. Rev. Rodney King: "Can't we all just get along?"

• Loud
• Crass
• Opinionated
• Demanding
• Often Wrong
• Chubby
• Retarded
• Son of a Bitch
• Bastard
• Pussy
• Meatball
• Slow
• Special
• Wimp
• Penis Breath
• Unfashionable

I predict a few of you will write a comment that includes many of the words listed above. Please stop, you're not as funny as you think you are. Only use them if you are really funny.

1 Comment

Auston said on July 02, 2012

You’re such an unforgiving meatball asshole.